I was reading something that a new friend of mine wrote about change and it struck me that I'm really not very well prepared for it to happen in my own life. More than anything, I long to be a man after God's own heart. But that desire is so often waylaid by my own inabilities to be righteous by myself. I'm a conflicted host. It's almost as if I shun God's revolutionary works in my life even as I call out to Him.
My problem essentially lies in the fact that when God really becomes the Lord of your life, He not only raises up, but He also denies and rebukes. I think sometimes I want the raising up part of spiritual growth without any of the admonition. I think what it all comes down to is that I haven't really made a suitable welcome for my God. I really need to develop humility and patience. Humility because despite all my best efforts, it is the Holy Spirit's powerful work that incrementally transforms my life, not my own work or ingenuity. Patience because this transformation requires time, error, and failure, and is far from immediate. I've believed since I was about five years old, and I still feel like Christ's work has only just begun in me.
I once read something that said "we were created in love in order to love, so that we may finally be embraced forever by a greater Love that will never let us go". That sounds about as good as it gets to me. I know I still have a long way to go to become the man that God created me to be. I think a good place to start would be to make a humble welcome for Him.
I was reading something that a new friend of mine wrote about change and it struck me that I'm really not very well prepared for it to happen in my own life. More than anything, I long to be a man after God's own heart. But that desire is so often waylaid by my own inabilities to be righteous by myself. I'm a conflicted host. It's almost as if I shun God's revolutionary works in my life even as I call out to Him.
My problem essentially lies in the fact that when God really becomes the Lord of your life, He not only raises up, but He also denies and rebukes. I think sometimes I want the raising up part of spiritual growth without any of the admonition. I think what it all comes down to is that I haven't really made a suitable welcome for my God. I really need to develop humility and patience. Humility because despite all my best efforts, it is the Holy Spirit's powerful work that incrementally transforms my life, not my own work or ingenuity. Patience because this transformation requires time, error, and failure, and is far from immediate. I've believed since I was about five years old, and I still feel like Christ's work has only just begun in me.
I once read something that said "we were created in love in order to love, so that we may finally be embraced forever by a greater Love that will never let us go". That sounds about as good as it gets to me. I know I still have a long way to go to become the man that God created me to be. I think a good place to start would be to make a humble welcome for Him.
Monday, July 28, 2008
Sunday, July 27, 2008
The Sound of Silence
Hi, my name's Jonathan Clark, and I'm addicted to white noise.
I've been doing a lot of thinking about busyness over the past year, and all that thinking finally culminated in the realization today that I haven't allowed for silence in my life. On a material level, I love napping with a fan on, my itunes runs enough hours of the day that it feels like it just came out of the oven, and I find myself getting lost in the general meaningless of slogan'ed and cliche'd conversations. On a more serious level, I'm finding it really hard to hear God's voice and understand His will. And if I'm going to be really honest, it's hard for me to even really know and understand my friends.
Sure, I've tried to be more cognisant of setting aside time for reflection and prayer, but I get easily distracted when I try to reflect on my week and I get a bit demanding (to a fault) when I pray. It was a verse in 1 Kings that really hit me hard today when I read it, and made me realize how much I need to shut up and attend to the Lord...here it is (actually, to give some background first, Elijah is running away from Jezebel (enemy) and is pretty depressed and feels completely forsaken. He retreats to Mt. Horeb where he hears a voice telling him to go stand on the mountain. Then this happens...)
Now there was a great wind, so strong that it was splitting mountains and breaking rocks in pieces before the Lord, but the Lord was not in the wind; and after the wind an earthquake, but the Lord was not in the earthquake; and after the earthquake a fire, but the Lord was not in the fire; and after the fire a sound of sheer silence (1 kings 19:11-12)
I looked at a couple of different translations on the last part, and though it varies, the idea is all the same: Elijah met God in the silence. The Great Communicator (God in this case, not Ronald Reagan) once again confronts me with an enormous paradox. As believers, we're called to find God, find ourselves, and find others in silence. Silence as a positive form of communication is everywhere in scripture and in nature!
First, more scripture...check this out...
1) Be still and know that I am God (psalm 46:10)
2)Be silent before the Lord God! (zephaniah 1:7)
3) But the Lord is in his holy temple; let all the earth keep silence before him! (habakkuk 2:20)
4) Never be rash with your mouth, nor let your heart be quick to utter a word before God, for God is in heaven, and you upon earth; therefore let your words be few. (ecclesiastes 5:2)
The advice and admonitions in scripture are certainly there, but I've seen it even in nature. It is felt in the quiet communion between two lovers when words are just completely superfluous. I mean, isn't that the kind of communication you would like to have with your future spouse? If God has a woman out there for me, I certainly would! Another example would be felt in the whispers of a mother comforting her child. I don't think it's so much the words that are said as it is the silent presence of the loving mother being made known to her child.
I think silence has gotten a bad rap because so often it is associated with loneliness, emptiness, relational failure, abandonment, and crushed hopes. I can't count the number of times that I've waited patiently for an expression of love, someone's blessing, or an apology and just been completely disappointed and disillusioned by their silence. It isn't the only possibility though. I'm presented with a new paradoxical sense of silence in that it fosters communication and strong relationships. It's an easy prescription that is difficult in practice.
I know it's worth the effort. Think of all the great spiritual leaders (Moses, Elijah, John the Baptist, Paul, and Jesus) who spent time in the desert and wilderness. It's not a flight from the world, but an attendance to the Lord in such a way that we come to know Him and ourselves. So yea, with all that being said, I'm really going to work on taking some time to be a little more silent. I think it will even have a really good impact on my friendships. I know I've been doing a lot of listening without really hearing, and I've done a lot of acting without really thinking, and it's about time that changed. Well, thanks for reading this...I know it was a bit long. Oh, also, if anyone has any practical ideas on how to make this work, I would love to hear 'em! My name is Jonathan Clark, and I've been silent for 45 minutes. :) Hi, my name's Jonathan Clark, and I'm addicted to white noise.
I've been doing a lot of thinking about busyness over the past year, and all that thinking finally culminated in the realization today that I haven't allowed for silence in my life. On a material level, I love napping with a fan on, my itunes runs enough hours of the day that it feels like it just came out of the oven, and I find myself getting lost in the general meaningless of slogan'ed and cliche'd conversations. On a more serious level, I'm finding it really hard to hear God's voice and understand His will. And if I'm going to be really honest, it's hard for me to even really know and understand my friends.
Sure, I've tried to be more cognisant of setting aside time for reflection and prayer, but I get easily distracted when I try to reflect on my week and I get a bit demanding (to a fault) when I pray. It was a verse in 1 Kings that really hit me hard today when I read it, and made me realize how much I need to shut up and attend to the Lord...here it is (actually, to give some background first, Elijah is running away from Jezebel (enemy) and is pretty depressed and feels completely forsaken. He retreats to Mt. Horeb where he hears a voice telling him to go stand on the mountain. Then this happens...)
Now there was a great wind, so strong that it was splitting mountains and breaking rocks in pieces before the Lord, but the Lord was not in the wind; and after the wind an earthquake, but the Lord was not in the earthquake; and after the earthquake a fire, but the Lord was not in the fire; and after the fire a sound of sheer silence (1 kings 19:11-12)
I looked at a couple of different translations on the last part, and though it varies, the idea is all the same: Elijah met God in the silence. The Great Communicator (God in this case, not Ronald Reagan) once again confronts me with an enormous paradox. As believers, we're called to find God, find ourselves, and find others in silence. Silence as a positive form of communication is everywhere in scripture and in nature!
First, more scripture...check this out...
1) Be still and know that I am God (psalm 46:10)
2)Be silent before the Lord God! (zephaniah 1:7)
3) But the Lord is in his holy temple; let all the earth keep silence before him! (habakkuk 2:20)
4) Never be rash with your mouth, nor let your heart be quick to utter a word before God, for God is in heaven, and you upon earth; therefore let your words be few. (ecclesiastes 5:2)
The advice and admonitions in scripture are certainly there, but I've seen it even in nature. It is felt in the quiet communion between two lovers when words are just completely superfluous. I mean, isn't that the kind of communication you would like to have with your future spouse? If God has a woman out there for me, I certainly would! Another example would be felt in the whispers of a mother comforting her child. I don't think it's so much the words that are said as it is the silent presence of the loving mother being made known to her child.
I think silence has gotten a bad rap because so often it is associated with loneliness, emptiness, relational failure, abandonment, and crushed hopes. I can't count the number of times that I've waited patiently for an expression of love, someone's blessing, or an apology and just been completely disappointed and disillusioned by their silence. It isn't the only possibility though. I'm presented with a new paradoxical sense of silence in that it fosters communication and strong relationships. It's an easy prescription that is difficult in practice.
I know it's worth the effort. Think of all the great spiritual leaders (Moses, Elijah, John the Baptist, Paul, and Jesus) who spent time in the desert and wilderness. It's not a flight from the world, but an attendance to the Lord in such a way that we come to know Him and ourselves. So yea, with all that being said, I'm really going to work on taking some time to be a little more silent. I think it will even have a really good impact on my friendships. I know I've been doing a lot of listening without really hearing, and I've done a lot of acting without really thinking, and it's about time that changed. Well, thanks for reading this...I know it was a bit long. Oh, also, if anyone has any practical ideas on how to make this work, I would love to hear 'em! My name is Jonathan Clark, and I've been silent for 45 minutes. :)
I've been doing a lot of thinking about busyness over the past year, and all that thinking finally culminated in the realization today that I haven't allowed for silence in my life. On a material level, I love napping with a fan on, my itunes runs enough hours of the day that it feels like it just came out of the oven, and I find myself getting lost in the general meaningless of slogan'ed and cliche'd conversations. On a more serious level, I'm finding it really hard to hear God's voice and understand His will. And if I'm going to be really honest, it's hard for me to even really know and understand my friends.
Sure, I've tried to be more cognisant of setting aside time for reflection and prayer, but I get easily distracted when I try to reflect on my week and I get a bit demanding (to a fault) when I pray. It was a verse in 1 Kings that really hit me hard today when I read it, and made me realize how much I need to shut up and attend to the Lord...here it is (actually, to give some background first, Elijah is running away from Jezebel (enemy) and is pretty depressed and feels completely forsaken. He retreats to Mt. Horeb where he hears a voice telling him to go stand on the mountain. Then this happens...)
Now there was a great wind, so strong that it was splitting mountains and breaking rocks in pieces before the Lord, but the Lord was not in the wind; and after the wind an earthquake, but the Lord was not in the earthquake; and after the earthquake a fire, but the Lord was not in the fire; and after the fire a sound of sheer silence (1 kings 19:11-12)
I looked at a couple of different translations on the last part, and though it varies, the idea is all the same: Elijah met God in the silence. The Great Communicator (God in this case, not Ronald Reagan) once again confronts me with an enormous paradox. As believers, we're called to find God, find ourselves, and find others in silence. Silence as a positive form of communication is everywhere in scripture and in nature!
First, more scripture...check this out...
1) Be still and know that I am God (psalm 46:10)
2)Be silent before the Lord God! (zephaniah 1:7)
3) But the Lord is in his holy temple; let all the earth keep silence before him! (habakkuk 2:20)
4) Never be rash with your mouth, nor let your heart be quick to utter a word before God, for God is in heaven, and you upon earth; therefore let your words be few. (ecclesiastes 5:2)
The advice and admonitions in scripture are certainly there, but I've seen it even in nature. It is felt in the quiet communion between two lovers when words are just completely superfluous. I mean, isn't that the kind of communication you would like to have with your future spouse? If God has a woman out there for me, I certainly would! Another example would be felt in the whispers of a mother comforting her child. I don't think it's so much the words that are said as it is the silent presence of the loving mother being made known to her child.
I think silence has gotten a bad rap because so often it is associated with loneliness, emptiness, relational failure, abandonment, and crushed hopes. I can't count the number of times that I've waited patiently for an expression of love, someone's blessing, or an apology and just been completely disappointed and disillusioned by their silence. It isn't the only possibility though. I'm presented with a new paradoxical sense of silence in that it fosters communication and strong relationships. It's an easy prescription that is difficult in practice.
I know it's worth the effort. Think of all the great spiritual leaders (Moses, Elijah, John the Baptist, Paul, and Jesus) who spent time in the desert and wilderness. It's not a flight from the world, but an attendance to the Lord in such a way that we come to know Him and ourselves. So yea, with all that being said, I'm really going to work on taking some time to be a little more silent. I think it will even have a really good impact on my friendships. I know I've been doing a lot of listening without really hearing, and I've done a lot of acting without really thinking, and it's about time that changed. Well, thanks for reading this...I know it was a bit long. Oh, also, if anyone has any practical ideas on how to make this work, I would love to hear 'em! My name is Jonathan Clark, and I've been silent for 45 minutes. :) Hi, my name's Jonathan Clark, and I'm addicted to white noise.
I've been doing a lot of thinking about busyness over the past year, and all that thinking finally culminated in the realization today that I haven't allowed for silence in my life. On a material level, I love napping with a fan on, my itunes runs enough hours of the day that it feels like it just came out of the oven, and I find myself getting lost in the general meaningless of slogan'ed and cliche'd conversations. On a more serious level, I'm finding it really hard to hear God's voice and understand His will. And if I'm going to be really honest, it's hard for me to even really know and understand my friends.
Sure, I've tried to be more cognisant of setting aside time for reflection and prayer, but I get easily distracted when I try to reflect on my week and I get a bit demanding (to a fault) when I pray. It was a verse in 1 Kings that really hit me hard today when I read it, and made me realize how much I need to shut up and attend to the Lord...here it is (actually, to give some background first, Elijah is running away from Jezebel (enemy) and is pretty depressed and feels completely forsaken. He retreats to Mt. Horeb where he hears a voice telling him to go stand on the mountain. Then this happens...)
Now there was a great wind, so strong that it was splitting mountains and breaking rocks in pieces before the Lord, but the Lord was not in the wind; and after the wind an earthquake, but the Lord was not in the earthquake; and after the earthquake a fire, but the Lord was not in the fire; and after the fire a sound of sheer silence (1 kings 19:11-12)
I looked at a couple of different translations on the last part, and though it varies, the idea is all the same: Elijah met God in the silence. The Great Communicator (God in this case, not Ronald Reagan) once again confronts me with an enormous paradox. As believers, we're called to find God, find ourselves, and find others in silence. Silence as a positive form of communication is everywhere in scripture and in nature!
First, more scripture...check this out...
1) Be still and know that I am God (psalm 46:10)
2)Be silent before the Lord God! (zephaniah 1:7)
3) But the Lord is in his holy temple; let all the earth keep silence before him! (habakkuk 2:20)
4) Never be rash with your mouth, nor let your heart be quick to utter a word before God, for God is in heaven, and you upon earth; therefore let your words be few. (ecclesiastes 5:2)
The advice and admonitions in scripture are certainly there, but I've seen it even in nature. It is felt in the quiet communion between two lovers when words are just completely superfluous. I mean, isn't that the kind of communication you would like to have with your future spouse? If God has a woman out there for me, I certainly would! Another example would be felt in the whispers of a mother comforting her child. I don't think it's so much the words that are said as it is the silent presence of the loving mother being made known to her child.
I think silence has gotten a bad rap because so often it is associated with loneliness, emptiness, relational failure, abandonment, and crushed hopes. I can't count the number of times that I've waited patiently for an expression of love, someone's blessing, or an apology and just been completely disappointed and disillusioned by their silence. It isn't the only possibility though. I'm presented with a new paradoxical sense of silence in that it fosters communication and strong relationships. It's an easy prescription that is difficult in practice.
I know it's worth the effort. Think of all the great spiritual leaders (Moses, Elijah, John the Baptist, Paul, and Jesus) who spent time in the desert and wilderness. It's not a flight from the world, but an attendance to the Lord in such a way that we come to know Him and ourselves. So yea, with all that being said, I'm really going to work on taking some time to be a little more silent. I think it will even have a really good impact on my friendships. I know I've been doing a lot of listening without really hearing, and I've done a lot of acting without really thinking, and it's about time that changed. Well, thanks for reading this...I know it was a bit long. Oh, also, if anyone has any practical ideas on how to make this work, I would love to hear 'em! My name is Jonathan Clark, and I've been silent for 45 minutes. :)
Thursday, July 24, 2008
From a Hotel Room in San Francisco
I am living in a hotel room for two weeks and working long days.
I am, at the same time, the most excited and the most terrified I've ever been in my entire life.
I am at Frost's diverging roads. I know I'll be better off if I relinquish control. Also, the "yellow wood" is quite urban, much to my dismay. Life changing transitional events are never as romanticized as you'd like them to be.
I promise not to grow up too fast.
I promise to do the best work I possibly can.
I promise pictures and worthwhile stories from these next two weeks.
See ya on the other side. I am living in a hotel room for two weeks and working long days.
I am, at the same time, the most excited and the most terrified I've ever been in my entire life.
I am at Frost's diverging roads. I know I'll be better off if I relinquish control. Also, the "yellow wood" is quite urban, much to my dismay. Life changing transitional events are never as romanticized as you'd like them to be.
I promise not to grow up too fast.
I promise to do the best work I possibly can.
I promise pictures and worthwhile stories from these next two weeks.
See ya on the other side.
I am, at the same time, the most excited and the most terrified I've ever been in my entire life.
I am at Frost's diverging roads. I know I'll be better off if I relinquish control. Also, the "yellow wood" is quite urban, much to my dismay. Life changing transitional events are never as romanticized as you'd like them to be.
I promise not to grow up too fast.
I promise to do the best work I possibly can.
I promise pictures and worthwhile stories from these next two weeks.
See ya on the other side. I am living in a hotel room for two weeks and working long days.
I am, at the same time, the most excited and the most terrified I've ever been in my entire life.
I am at Frost's diverging roads. I know I'll be better off if I relinquish control. Also, the "yellow wood" is quite urban, much to my dismay. Life changing transitional events are never as romanticized as you'd like them to be.
I promise not to grow up too fast.
I promise to do the best work I possibly can.
I promise pictures and worthwhile stories from these next two weeks.
See ya on the other side.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
Posts
